Squirrel!!!!!!

Most of us have some sort of plan starting the day but then we get sidetracked by texts, phone calls, emails, random thoughts, etc. It seems to be getting worse with all the different platforms (Facebook, Instagram, etc.).

There’s hope though, we can get better at focusing and become more Indistractable. In Nir Eyal’s book of the same title, he outlines a solid plan for addressing this issue. His focus is mainly on business folks but I see a clear application for those of us in recovery. Like most, my relapses all occurred when I was distracted from what I should have been doing.

Here are a few key points to begin with.

1. While distraction triggers may seem to be external, they’re really triggering something within me. I’d RATHER mindlessly scroll FB than finish that detailed post or email. And I’m most easily distracted when I’m stuck making a decision. I really need to learn to push through that discomfort, face my fears of failure, and solve the problem.

2. Exercise can really help with learning how to push through discomfort.

3. Running is also very meditative, repetitive, and mindful. It teaches us how to focus.

Running/walking has really helped me, give it try. And check that book as well.

Active in recovery

Recovery, like most things, is not a spectator sport. No one else can recover FOR you just like no one can exercise for you! It’s gonna take effort and some discomfort but believe us it’s worth it.

Yesterday, we walked with the men at CATS and it was brutal (15 F with 25 MPH winds). When we walked away from the wind it wasn’t so bad but as soon as we faced the wind it hurt. It took our breath away, stung our faces, and made us wanna keep walking away from the wind. The problem, of course, is that if we kept walking we’d not only miss lunch and a nice warm room, the PO’s would be sending a deputy shortly to give us a ride “home”.

So…we gritted our teeth and faced the wind, no matter what! We all survived and learned an important lesson

Life and recovery are full of uncomfortable and painful things that we must face. If we don’t, we never make progress. We have to face the pain to move on. Trust us, it won’t kill you. Stop turning away from it and face it head-on. We’ll walk with you!

Connection is the foundation

Connection in a safe and accepting group is what we offer at Running2bwell. We start with the assumption that we’re all messed up and have some struggles. We gather together to connect and be active (walk, run. or workout).

While exercise is important to mental health and recovery, connection is probably more important.

The opposite of addiction is connection!

-Johann Hari

We’ve all been there, feeling lonely and cut off. We’ve tried to be a part of something but it hasn’t worked out for whatever reason. Social media has probably made this all worse by deceiving us into thinking that we have healthy relationships only to find that they were superficial.

That’s why we strive to offer healthy connections with other folks working towards mental wellness and sobriety. We’re not always perfect (cause we’re all messed up) but we’ll keep trying to connect with you as long as you keep coming.

But it starts with you showing up, sending a message…connecting. The door is open.

Know us by our name!

Running2bwell is the name we chose for our group, we chose it carefully, and you can learn a lot about us just from our name.

1. Exercise (specifically running and walking) is a clear path to mental health, sobriety, and recovery! Check out a sampling of scientific articles that prove it. Very likely you’ve experienced this in your own life at some point. You feel good when you’re active and moving. #ActivateHappy

2. We have the power, the choice to heal. We may need help along the way, but we have it within ourselves to heal the trauma, repair the damage, and rebuild our resilience.

3. In the end, it’s our sole responsibility to do what we can to take control of our thoughts, feelings, and actions. No one else can do it for us.

We’re here to help you learn how to use exercise as a powerful coping tool.

Be Connected, be Active, Bwell!

We're all messed up AND...

I’ve often felt alone in my life. Not just lonely but like no one else has experienced what I have. Can you relate? I think we’ve all felt that way from time to time.

To be sure, we’ve all had different experiences, some admittedly worse than others. BUT everyone has had loss and trauma in their in lives so let’s find ways to both learn from and help each other.

We’re all messed up AND we all have something to offer one another! All those perfect posts from perfect people are just a mirage, don’t be fooled. So, don’t get down on yourself thinking that no one can relate to your struggles. Open up a little to close friends and you’ll likely find that they’ve not only been through similar things but they’ve learned how to overcome. #wedorecover

Last thing…don’t swing to the other extreme thinking that you don’t have any issues with addictions or mental health. I stand by my original statement “We’re all messed up”! :-)

Be pro-active!

Exercise helps us feel better and the effects can be felt immediately but it is most effective when done consistently and in reasonable doses; kinda like vitamins. You wouldn’t take a handful of vitamins every week or so and expect any long-term benefits.

If you’re new to an exercise routine, start small and slowly build up your capacity.

• Ten minutes is a great place to start.

• Check out this video!

• Then slowly add duration, variety, reps, and intensity by about 10% each week.

Consistency is the key, set a schedule and stick to it the best you can. This is critical for the first few weeks. The more you move, the more you’ll be motivated to move. Just don’t over do it and get sore and discouraged.

Eventually, you’ll work up to 150 Mins per week, which is the minimum amount recommended for physical and mental health. After each workout ask yourself how you are feeling, maybe even keep a log.

Remember that exercise is a better preventative than cure! Starting and sticking with a simple exercise routine is a great way to avoid those dreaded winter blues. Yes, it’s cold outside but you can bundle up and go out for a lovely snow-globe walk/run and/or stay inside and get a great workout. There are so many bodyweight routines on youtube.

OK, no excuses, let’s do this! Your well-being is worth the investment. For just 10 minutes a day, you can start building a brand new YOU!

Be active!

We're built to move! Our legs, lungs, hearts, and even our brains, are all designed for us to move. We’re programmed for action, to walk/run the majority of the day. Our brains are happiest and healthiest when we move. We even have a built-in reward system that releases dopamine and endorphins to make us feel satisfied and good when we move. But modern society robs us of most movement. Many of us have sedentary jobs and habits.

So, it’s no big surprise that most of us are anxious and depressed.

The good news is that it is relatively simple to change this trend. Move more.

I want you to try something, right now! Just stand up, march in place, raise your hands, do some air squats. I mean it, do it! Don’t you feel a little better? I bet you do.

Now, work on building habits to slowly increase your activity levels and remember that the goal is to be happier so do something you like.

#ActivateHappy simply means that when we move more, we’re happier.

We need each other!

If you’ve been to one of our meetings, you’ve likely been through a short warm-up where we balance on one foot. This helps to activate and warm up the core muscles and also the motion parts of your brain. It’s a little challenging for most of us.

You’ve also likely experienced our support circle where we link arms to show how much more stable WE are TOGETHER! It shows pretty starkly how a group of unstable folks can become stronger and more stable by simply connecting with others.

BE CONNECTED!

No matter how strong or weak you are, you play a part in the circle. But…you must be intentional and reach out to others. The whole group suffers when someone withdraws.

Let the circle be unbroken!

It’s also true that a few (or even one) really weak/unstable folks can bring the entire circle down. So choose your circle wisely.

We're all Messed Up!

We’re all messed up and at the same time, we all have something to share. This is the foundation of Running2bwell

There is no us and them! We all have some mental health and addiction issues and we discourage the use of labels. There are varying degrees of struggles but we can all benefit from being more resilient.

Rather than being dismal, this is actually freeing and empowering. The first step in solving a problem is acknowledging that you have one. So, if you’re tracking with me, you’ve already made a very important first step in your journey to becoming a better version of yourself.

Because we all share similar struggles, we can learn quite a bit from each other. That’s what Running2bwell is all about. Peers helping peers: supporting, encouraging, and challenging each other. In five years, we’ve learned that healing/recovery/growth boil down to three components.

Be connected!

Be active!

Be well!

These aren’t discrete or sequential steps but rather all interrelated.

In the meantime, we’re so glad that you’ve joined us.

Behind each smile there’s a story, struggle, and victory!

The up-hills and the downs

Yesterday was a tough day, feeling fatigued and down. Talking and swallowing hurt and it makes it hard to eat and of course, I miss talking to folks. The reality of my cancer and its effects on my life is looming large and it’s overwhelming. It’s even more concerning because I haven’t even started treatment yet. It feels a little like a race that starts uphill and then gets steeper.

Today was also a beautiful day. So many people have reached out to support me, my family, and Running2bwell. I have the best support network a man could ask for and I know they’ll carry me during the difficult times ahead. It’s humbling and overwhelming in a sense like the positive will outweigh the negative in the end.

So, like running on hills I need to pace myself on the difficult climbs and just keep focused on the next steps, relentless forward progress. I also need to trust my support crew to give me a push and even carry me at times. The summit will come at some point and then I can coast a bit.

I’m learning how to take the ups with the downs, it’s the only way to roll.

PS: Today was a much better day!

You can improve your odds but there are no guarantees

I’m facing some potentially significant health problems. No need to go into the details here because we all face issues and I don’t have all the information just yet. But, I did want to share an encouraging word that came from one of the nurses today.

After my procedure, we were chatting and I mentioned our group (most people that meet me learn all about Running2bwell). I was expressing disappointment to have these current struggles because I take pretty good care of myself and I know life’s not fair but… She quickly responded that my good health will be instrumental to my recovery. Wow, I knew this but she really helped keep things in perspective.

There are no guarantees for a long and healthy life, no matter how good of shape I’m in. The results are never up to me. The point is to do what I can to improve the chances for success. 

I’ll continue to do the next right thing, make decisions that improve my chances for a positive outcome.  I’ll learn to accept the things I can’t change (like the past) and gain the strength to change the things I can (like my present actions). I need to focus on what I can control and not waste valuable time and energy on the things I can’t.

1. What things do you need to let go of trying to control?

2. What things can you do today to improve your chances tomorrow?

Pump up your willpower

I’ve noticed that I struggle to make good decisions (or any at all) when I’m tired and worn down. Can you relate?

It might help you to think of your willpower as a muscle. It can be strengthened, it can grow weak when not used, it needs rest, etc. Willpower is another way of saying self-control or impulse control, it’s the ability to delay gratification for a better future reward.

Here are three ways to strengthen your willpower.

1. Set up healthy self-care routines. Sounds boring but if our self-care is built into our daily schedules then we don’t have to expend energy deciding, we just “do”. For example, physical exercise is the foundation of my self-care and recovery plan. On cold gray Mondays (like today) it’s less of a struggle for me to get outside because I exercise every day and my body and mind just expect it.

2. The very act of developing routines strengthens your willpower and builds confidence.

3. Avoid stressful situations (triggers, big decisions, and important discussions) as much as possible when you’re worn down. Sleep on it and decide in the morning. You wouldn’t try to run a 5k race right after finishing a marathon, would you? Recognize when you’re tired and take a break and recover.

My overall goal this year is to be stronger in all aspects of life, especially mentally. Let’s get stronger together!

Goals, let's be SMART about them!

You likely know about SMART goals, if not, look it up.

Today, I want to focus on the R in SMART, relevant.

In Running2bwell, setting exercise goals is relevant to our recovery by focusing on the positive mental aspects. We’re more interested in how exercise makes us feel (improved mood, less anxious, more energized) than physical performance. While it’s generally true that we need to push ourselves physically to reap the mental benefits, it’s very easy to cross the line and push too hard. This can become counterproductive if it leads to disappointment or wrose, injury.

The key is to make the primary goal about feelings. #activatehappy. Walk, run, workout for the sheer pleasure of it. Pick an activity that you enjoy and get started with short sessions (snacks) of maybe 10 minutes. Being active at the same time of day (mornings are best) will increase your chances of success. After about a week of steady routine, slowly increase either the intensity or duration. Aim for increasing only 10% each week. Focus on the positive feelings after each session.

Goals are tools to achieve something but you need to be SMART about them and stay focused on the main thing, which is your recovery.

Joining a group like ours will dramatically improve your success. Plus it’s way more fun together! Check out our weekly meetings to get connected.

Patience-probably the hardest thing to wait for

If you don’t have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?

-John Wooden

I’m an impatient person; most of us can say that with honesty. Almost all my mistakes (big and small) have been made in haste, rushing forward without thinking things through, in a hurry to feel good NOW! Can you relate? I bet you can.

Well, I’ve learned a little patience through running and exercise. I remember my first real break through about 8 years ago while training for my first marathon. Not only did I have to patiently and slowly build my weekly mileage, I had to learn how to really SLOW down on those long runs. Not to mention that it took 4 months to prepare my body and mind. The eureka moment came when I noticed that I could stay on a task like driving all day or working on a difficult engineering problem much longer than before. I could focus longer and be patient.

In addiction, we wreck our internal reward system to the point that we struggle to control impulses. We want it and we want it now, usually regardless of consequences later. I won’t get into all the science here but I think we all agree that instant gratification and impulse control are big problems in our addiction, recovery and society at large.

Consider trying a new coping skill, by starting a regular exercise program. It really helped me heal. You don’t have to run a marathon to learn this, just start taking some extra steps each day. Let us know how we can help you on this journey. I still have a ways to go and would love some company.

Exercise snacking

We are all busy and sometimes it's difficult to set aside 30 minutes each day for exercise. Why not break it into 3-10 minute sessions?

Exercising in short bursts throughout the day- exercise snacking- is a great way to fit working out into your schedule. It's just as effective as doing a continuous workout. In fact, some studies show that it is actually better at boosting your mood, reducing cravings, and sharpening your mental focus than longer workouts.

Pick 2-3 body movements that target different muscle groups. I would suggest air squats, push-ups (a lot of modifications available), marching or jumping jacks. These will not only get your heart rate up, they will also develop functional strength.

Commit to it. Each day when you are starting to fade, lose focus, feel like grabbing a less than healthy snack, try substituting an exercise snack. I'm pretty sure you will find that you feel better in the long run.

So, let's get snacking!

Humility drives growth

It's only when we realize that we are struggling that we're truly motivated to work towards growth..
Let's face it, we are all bluffing. We are all putting on a brave face, pretending that we are doing better than we actually are, that we have all the answers. If everyone around me knew just how insecure, conflicted, angry, confused, unsure, etc. I felt most of the time they would probably be surprised. I’m a hot mess on the inside and you can likely say the same. I'm not recommending that we be completely vulnerable all the time but I am saying that we should recognize our struggles and faults and then, more importantly, work towards growth and improvement.
Running2bWell was founded on the principle that we are all "messed up". We all have struggles!
In the movie Karate Kid-Daniel knew that he needed help only after he got his butt kicked a few times. He sought help but Mr. Miyagi still had to break through the pride "wax on, wax off" tho. Finally, Daniel-son started listening, learning, working and growing stronger.

Stay humble and teachable my friends and let's grow stronger together.